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Nothing is Mundane!

By Laura

I’m feeling very happy and settled here in the Serra d’Acor; in fact it feels like and is home. I’ve been given care of the gardens, the day-to-day growing and tending and the longer term vision and this just thrills me. If ever I’m feeling in need of joy I take the air in the garden and am always calmed and uplifted. I’ve settled into my winter residence, the yurt, from my summer residence, my bivi bag and tarp in the garden. And although I miss sleeping with the plants, insects and little people, I am grateful for duvet, burner and roast chestnuts as the nights draw in cold and damp.

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Today I feel totally in touch with my true self, a quiet ecstatic joy, which happens when I remember the right relationship to have with my experience of life. Which I’m discovering is taking the position to be in service to spirit, without knowing what that will look like but leaning forward into life with innocence and interest asking only for knowledge of what to do next and accepting and experiencing the power to carry that out.

It’s such a liberating position to hold and I lost sight of it a little this week in illness, perceived (not actual) loss and a dose of victimization. Last night, as well, I had the realisation that the above position, this leaning forward into the unknown, unknowing, applies to EVERY aspect of my experience not just the big stuff but even, maybe especially, the mundane stuff; the feeling ill, the stubbing my toe, the feeling jealous, the not being able to sleep, the interactions with my friends. If I lean into life with interest at all times (which surely is the point) then, and get this, I laughed so hard last night when I realised this; NOTHING IS MUNDANE!!! It all has the potential to serve spirit and evolve consciousness! How wonderful is that? In fact it feels perfect to me.

So now if I feel stuck or feel a strong wave of, say, a particular emotion that could pull me out of this position I can ask, what is the most evolutionary thing I can do now? The answer will come and I can choose to do it. I’ll give an example of this. Mim was talking about teaching and how she could use this talent for the benefit of the project. I felt waves of envy at her skill and a tightening in my gut as thoughts comparing her to me started churning through my mind. Thoughts that detailed how much more useful she is than me, how much everyone else will think of her over me. Nothing new there at all. My old reaction would be first to heavily berate myself for being  a small minded envious person (e.g. no wonder I don’t have any talents, what do I bring compared to that? she’s so much better than me etc). In other words becoming totally involved in the arising of those thoughts as if they were true. This would lead to me being preoccupied as I argued or believed them, feeling separate from Mim and being distracted from everyone else and the project.  I would feel down and distracted for however long it took to gain some perspective or for the mood to move on, this could take days.

But this time I felt the emotion well up I leaned into my experience with interest and asked ‘What is the most evolutionary thing I can do now’ and the answer was to have a different relationship to the thoughts and the emotions. The question gave me the space to see that they are just an impersonal movement of ego, a conditioned response and it didn’t mean ANYTHING! I don’t need to follow the thoughts, I didn’t need to argue with them, counter them or repress them I could just let them and the emotions be and get on with my day. So I did, I just accepted that I am a human being not a bad person, these things will come up and that’s part of life, smile and move on!

It was a huge step for me and so liberating. And later when I saw Mim instead of feeling envious, inferior or resentful I just felt gratitude and love that she was living this life with me, sharing those talents and that she had give me the juice to recognise the movement of ego and the chance to ignore it. I love this liberating life!

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So apart from the odd realisation of the true nature of life and one’s purpose in it, my life here is very chop wood carry water! We live with this gloriously huge context of being totally committed to evolving consciousness and sharing this perspective with visitors, volunteers and further afield, yet live simply and gently with the land and each other. I am home.

2 Comments

  1. Daniel Piatek says:

    Laura, Thanks for this beautifully expressed tale of freedom. It was just the inspiration I needed. In gratitude, Daniel

  2. Dear Laura,
    Thank you for your simple and beautifull description of a liberated relationship to live. That is the fundation of a new culture, a culture of putting spirit above ego. Can you imagine engaging in this way with everything and everyone what a beautifull world we will create together. thanks
    with love,
    Caroline

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